The Thoughts of a Humanist

Everyone is used to those mornings where your legs don’t want to move, your arms have the same train of thought as your legs, and you personally know you have responsibilities that need taking care of.  Everyone knows that whether you like it or not, reality is something your going to have to face, or maybe you’ve already faced it, but it’s just so damn hard to deal with.  Maybe you found out your ex cheated on you while you were in a relationship with them.  Or, maybe, one of your closest friends is currently in the hospital after getting in a car accident.  I’m sure at least one of you guys reading this will understand.

Still, on the opposite side of the spectrum, what do you do, when you have no drama in your life, no worries, no agony, no pain or betrayal to deal with, it’s the middle of the night, and the moon is keeping you awake?  Somehow, the brightness of the moon penetrates the black shades you have draped over windows, and decides to bring back memories you had forgotten about.  Long lost doors of your past that you were sure you locked and dead-bolted shut but, the moon came along, with it’s skeleton key, and unlocked all of them.  Suddenly, you’re not alone anymore, and a torrent of thoughts rushes back at you, when the one thing you want most in the entirety of the universe, at that very moment, is to sleep.  Yet, you also know, that the imagination of your mind won’t let you, or else you’ll forget what it’s trying to show you.

To those who wait until 4 am to roll around so your brain finally shut’s up, you have my sympathies.

Tell me if you’ve ever done this before:  I just had a conversation with my boss about a group of employees’ misconduct towards the people they work for.  The thing is, I’m a volunteer at a hospital, and the employees I mentioned are doctors.  High-ranking, Ph. D, Braniacs, who obviously know what they’re doing.  Yet, for some reason, they are making errors, which disrupts the system of my department, and ultimately hurts the hospital.  So, what gives me the right to bring to attention the problems that have arisen from their work?  Nothing.  Absolutely, batshit, nothing.  That’s right. I’m a lowly volunteer, who just passed his first year of service, three months ago, and here I am, possibly crashing in the world of a 43 year veteran, whose been working in the medical industry longer than I’ve been alive.  Talk about intimidating, right?  Here I am watching Grey’s Anatomy, hoping that the next phone call I receive lacks the mentioning of me getting fired.

Still, have you ever had to confront your boss’s boss’s boss’s boss?  If you have, you know how I feel.  If you haven’t…well, I suggest you refrain from said activity because not only are you torturing yourself to a sweat induced syndrome of Oh-My-God-I’m-Going-To-Die, you might have just sacrificed your own potential career, in a world renowned field of study, just to point out someone else’s fault.

Lesson to be learned: Don’t create drama in a hospital.  It might just backfire on you.